Will you join me?

If life is a journey, I really don't know where mine is taking me. I don't have a destination at the moment, because I seem to have lost my way. The roads that I have been travelling recently have frankly, been quite steep and hilly. I need help to get over them and I don't wish to travel alone.

On July 12th, 2009, my life changed in a way that I wasn't prepared for at all. After living with melanoma skin cancer for 11 years and fighting with all of her might to live as it was quickly spreading through her body the last year, my mother had no choice but to start a journey somewhere else without us. She didn't want to leave and none of us in the family wanted her to go, but for reasons I will never know or understand why, her journey here was over. I have screamed and sobbed for her to come back, but the screams just echo out into the distance and I am always left feeling half empty and so very lost.

But, I know I am not alone. I will always carry pieces of my mother with me wherever I go, and maybe the pain will lesson with time. Maybe the pain stays the same and you just learn to accept the hurt along with the happiness that life's journey brings with it, and then it is alright. I am not alone because I have help from my family, my friends, and from a world of music, which all keep me smiling and searching for the joys filled in every nook and cranny of life. They help me remember that after long periods of darkness and gloomy rain, the sun always comes out to shine again. I want to share this journey of life with people I love and be thankful for all that I still have. I love my mom, I will never forget her, I will miss her painfully, but I have to keep on moving. I have to find out what is past these awkward hills ahead.

Will you join me?